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| My photograph from the Tribune article. |
Publication of the article coincided almost to the day with the fifth anniversary of my bilateral mastectomy surgery. It was a great way for me to mark that milestone and to reaffirm my decision not to have reconstruction.
I was delighted that the article presented a balanced look at the choices available for women after a mastectomy and particularly pleased that the reporter, Alexia Elejalde-Ruiz, highlighted my view that many women who choose not to have reconstruction still feel "whole" after the surgery.
As some of you probably know firsthand, doctors frequently urge their patients to have reconstruction, believing that they won't feel happy without it. While I agree that reconstruction helps some women feel normal and whole after a mastectomy, I've met countless others who have chosen not to reconstruct and nevertheless feel complete as women. One of the missions of BreastFree.org is to educate doctors and encourage them to present non-reconstruction as a viable and positive option for their patients. So, I was very glad the Tribune story mentioned this issue.
The Tribune article also represented my coming-out party. While I've been very open about my surgery with friends and family, I've chosen not to include my full name on BreastFree.org, nor has it appeared in any other published materials. It felt good to finally put myself out there. Over the years, as I've met and communicated with so many women who have chosen not to have reconstruction, I've realized what a special sisterhood this is. I'm proud to be a member!
It is lovely to see the beautiful face and smile that go along with this inspirational website. I am 4-weeks post-bilateral mastectomy without reconstruction. Your website was a great source of information and comfort as I navigated my diagnosis and a medical environment that while ultimately supportive seemed shocked by my resolve that I neither needed nor wanted reconstruction. Largely in part because of your website, I felt emotionally, visually and socially solid in my decision.
ReplyDeleteMany, many thanks.
So nice to discover this blog again. I am not yet at the 5 year mark and, while I am still comfortable with my decision, I am finding that as I've gained more weight in these last few years, I am feel more self-conscious about my decision. I've just gone through another round of trying to find a way to look "normal' on top without being totally uncomfortable. (Buying bras, prostheses, etc.) Most of the women I know have had reconstruction so it's just nice to be reminded that there are those who are glad they didn't! Thanks for all the support.
ReplyDeleteI was so happy to find this blog and to read your recent story/ post. I had a double mastectomy (I'm BRCA+) without reconstruction in May and I have not regretted it for a moment. Being able to tap into the collective experience of women who made the same decision has been great. I made microbead forms and saved about $75; innovated for my swimsuits [if you are thin, the Speedo suits sold at Costco are perfect, with fibrefill inserts covered in swimsuit lining material, sold at fabric shops; Amoena also makes lightweight comfortable swimsuits but they are very expensive].
ReplyDeleteMy only issue, interestingly, is that I had trouble finding a shop which would bill Medicare for my silicone prosthetics and bras, even 'though I was covered, because I did not have a cancer diagnosis on my prescription[many BRCA+ women have preventive mastectomies and I had already been through chemo for ovarian cancer, also related to the BRCA mutation]. I tell friends and close neighbors about the mastectomy; I see this as a way of educating people about cancer-related genetic conditions and about the choice of no reconstruction. Maybe it's age, but I find it really liberating not to worry about breasts or breast cancer.
It was wonderful to finally "see" you in the article. Thank you for posting the link. Your website was a God-send to me almost 2 years ago, after a double mastectomy and no-recon decision when I found out I had to face breast cancer again after 13 years, a few months shy of my 50th birthday. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteJust wanted to add that, by far, the most comfortable bra I've found yet after years of searching is called the "Zeebra" and you can order them online. They aren't made for post-mastectomy gals but they do have pockets and come with pads. I can squeeze my silcone inserts into the pocket but moslty just use the lighter foam pads.
ReplyDeleteI was just recently diagnosed with adh/stage zero. I am having bilaterals 2012.i am not comfortable putting implants in and all that goes with the cosmetics of multiple surgeries. I just hope I can be comfortable with my new look. I am glad I found this website . It's comforting to know even though some don't think this the "norm" and how could you not reconstruct. It is an extremely personal choice. The stress alone and the loneliness can be unbearable.
ReplyDeleteI am getting a double mass very soon and have chosen no reconstruction. Glad to have found this site...what is the best mass. bras and inserts you would recommend?
ReplyDeleteOn BreastFree.org, you'll find recommendations for breast forms as well as for bras and camisoles. Best of luck with your surgery and recovery.
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